


Incognito

by Mnemosyne_Elegy



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Gen, Humor, Questionable disguises, Team Shadow Gear
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-06
Updated: 2020-09-06
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:53:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26312956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mnemosyne_Elegy/pseuds/Mnemosyne_Elegy
Summary: The team has a job, but there's just one problem: they've already been banned from town for prior destructiveness. But the reward is a key, so they have no choice. They'll just have to go in disguise. It's time to break out the pillow fat-suits and metal studs—they're going in as Team Shadow Gear.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 18





	Incognito

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally in "Words" too, and I made a last-minute decision to move it out. "Illegible" was the same way. And I really wanted to keep 'I' as humor, which meant I had to come up with a third humor concept for that one (specifically, that started with the letter 'I'). Pure humor is still not my forte *sigh*

"This one." Lucy slapped a page onto the table and glared, daring anyone to defy her.

Everyone had their own page ripped off the job board, and they were all prepared to fight for it.

"Who cares about sorting through some dusty old magic books?" Natsu asked. "It would be way cooler to–"

"The reward is a key," Lucy interrupted.

And that was that. Everyone deflated, knowing defeat when they saw it. Lucy gave a charming smile and ushered them out to the train station.

.

They were halfway to the town of Ashwood before someone recognized the name.

"Isn't that the town that banned us from ever coming back?" Happy asked, squinting at the notice.

"Which one?" asked Gray.

"A couple months ago? We, like, destroyed a neighborhood and broke a water main so that everything flooded? I don't remember how, exactly. Or how we got anywhere near a water main."

"Oh. Yeah." Gray looked a little sheepish. "I might've accidentally frozen all the water and exploded the pipe. But to be fair, Erza also hit it with like twenty swords and Natsu was already burning the place down."

Erza's eyes lit up. "Mayor Jigglypuff! I remember. Yeah, he told us to never set foot in his town again."

"Was that his actual name?"

"Great," said Natsu. "Let's forget them and their stupid books, then. We can go do a fun job instead!"

Lucy cast a baleful gaze over them all. "The reward is a key," she said again.

"But–"

"You had better make a convincing apology."

Natsu and Gray exchanged almost identical looks of disgust.

"I have a better idea," Erza said. There was a gleam to her eyes that sent a shiver through the group. "Let's go incognito."

.

"This is a terrible idea," Gray said, attempting to step forward and nearly face-planting. He waddled another few steps, with some difficulty. The pillows stuffed underneath a new set of oversized clothes greatly restricted his movement. His head looked tiny in comparison.

"The reward is a key," said Lucy. "You'd better make it work."

With the help of a blue wig, she had been transformed into Levy. She was the obvious choice, being the most similar in stature and most familiar with her mannerisms. The only problem was the chest. Her attempts to wrap it a bit… _flatter_ had met with some success, but the overall effect didn't look quite right.

Not as bad as Erza, though, who had set her heart on being Jet so that she didn't have to wear the pillow fat-suit. Even with her hair stuffed under a wig, she didn't look terribly masculine. Neither did her chest.

But this had been her grand plan, and now she glared at the person who had dared defy it.

"Excuse me?" she said.

"I'm just saying, we hardly look like them," Gray complained, gesturing awkwardly to himself. Natsu snickered as his rival struggled to lift his puffy arm. He bulged in all the wrong places.

"Well, I doubt Team Shadow Gear has been here before," Erza said. "It's not a big town. They won't know any better. As long as we have different identities and don't look like ourselves, we should be fine."

"If we have to do this, I don't see why I can't be Gajeel. These pillows are ridiculous."

"Because you're not a dragon slayer," Natsu said haughtily. He had managed to get away with only a black wig and switching out his ridiculous sandals for boots. Although, to be fair, they had glued some metal studs to his ear and face in place of Gajeel's piercings. And if Gray had maybe volunteered to find the adhesive and picked super glue, no one else knew any better yet.

"So?"

"So you can't pretend to be a dragon slayer. It's against the rules."

"Rules? What _rules_?"

"I really hope this washes out," Happy interrupted, inspecting his paws. He had complained vociferously about dyeing his fur black to match Pantherlily, but had been outvoted in the end.

"Um… Yeah. Definitely." Lucy's reassuring smile looked something like a grimace. "Black is always the easiest color to wash out."

They all stared at each other. Aside from Erza, whose face was bright with smug satisfaction, they all looked a little unsure. It wasn't just that they didn't look like Team Shadow Gear, but that they hardly looked like people at all. Or that they looked exactly like people in suits trying way too hard.

"Eh," said Natsu finally. "Close enough."

Erza clapped her hands together in delight. "Let's go meet Mayor Jinglepop."

.

The mayor, who introduced himself as Mayor Jenkins, eyed the group as if they were aliens dressed as people. A fair assessment if one didn't know any better. Or even if one did.

"Fairy Tail?" he repeated. "We had a group from Fairy Tail come through before." His eyes narrowed. "They destroyed half the city."

" _Town_ ," Happy coughed.

"Oh, you must mean Natsu," Gray said. "He's a real pain."

Natsu glared. " _Excuse me?"_

Lucy made a shushing sound and threw a pleading look at Erza. But Erza was no help whatsoever in keeping the boys in line, as her earlier excitement had transformed into acute stage fright despite the distinct lack of a stage. Who would have guessed her inability to act would extend so far? She trembled like a leaf and moved in stiff, jerky motions that made her look more zombie than human.

"We know them," Lucy said carefully. "But we aren't quite as…destructive. We'll take good care of your to–" She coughed. "Ah, city."

"Y-y-yeah," Erza stuttered through chattering teeth. "W-w-we're t-t-totally n-n-not them."

"Very convincing," Happy muttered.

The mayor stared at Erza very hard, brows drawn together. With the exaggerated stage fright, she looked even stranger than Gray—and that was saying something. She would totally give them away.

Finally, he nodded. "Right… Well, the collection is this way."

It took far longer to get to the vault than it should have, with Gray waddling along and occasionally tripping and Erza walking like a malfunctioning robot. At one point, a stray pillow fell out of Gray's pants. He kicked it back around the corner and out of sight.

"Here you go," said the mayor, gesturing around to a large room full of books of all shapes and colors and sizes. "If you could take a look at the ones we've laid out and let us know if there are any with useful magic, I'd appreciate it. We thought it would be better to have real mages take a look. I'll leave you to it."

He turned to go and paused. Now he frowned at Gray, Erza forgotten. He opened his mouth, closed it again. Then he hurried past, shaking his head and disappearing down the hallway as fast as his legs could carry him.

Gray shrugged. He couldn't blame the man for thinking they were freaks. Lucy took one look at him and groaned.

"Gray, your shirt!"

Somewhere along the way, he had shed his shirt and the pillows tucked beneath it, revealing a bare and muscled chest in sharp contrast to the lumpy puffiness of the rest of his body.

"Oh," he said. "Oops."

Meanwhile, Erza was waking from her stupor now that her audience had departed. Shaking her head sharply to dispel her nerves, she clapped her hands together and looked around at the shelves of books.

"We did it," she said with great satisfaction. "We have successfully infiltrated the town. Now, let's sort out the magic books so we can get our reward."

Natsu groaned. "Boring."

"The reward is a key," Lucy said. "Get to work."

.

Three hours later, they were back on the train.

"That was fun," Natsu said cheerfully.

Lucy sighed. "I don't even care. At least I got the key. Even if it turned out to be a _lame_ key. Hardly worth the hassle."

"I can't believe Mayor Jimblepoof didn't want to give it to you," Erza said. "What a rude little man."

"And _I'm_ your favorite, right, Lucy?" Happy purred. "Since I swiped the key for you?"

"Of course," Lucy said with an indulgent smile.

"Should've swiped more jewels," Gray muttered. He had settled his discarded pillows around himself in a comfy nest.

"It went fabulously," Erza said. "The disguises worked like a charm."

Gray raised his eyebrows.

"What?" she asked. "It's not like they'll ever find out."

* * *

"There's something off about this place," Gajeel growled as the team wove through the streets. People gave them strange looks and whispered behind their hands.

"It's a pretty small town," Droy said, huffing to keep up. "Sometimes people in small towns are suspicious of outsiders."

"Then why are they sending out jobs to outsiders?"

"It will be fine," Levy interrupted with a sigh, exchanging a tired look with Jet. "Just be on your best behavior."

Team Shadow Gear was met at the door to the mayor's mansion by an angry mob. Someone they presumed to be the mayor stood at the front of the disgruntled citizenry.

" _You_ ," he said. "You have a lot of nerve coming back here."

"Back?" Gajeel asked. "We've never been here before."

"After last time, _no_ Fairy Tail mage is ever allowed back here. And especially not _you_."

A puzzled frown creased Levy's face, but she tried playing peacekeeper. "What happened last time?" she asked. "Maybe we can help you."

" _Help_ us?" the mayor roared, face red with rage. "After you burned down our entire collection of magic scrolls and sacred texts and half the city along with it? I don't think so."

"But we never–"

"Whoa!" said Jet. "Are you pointing a _pitchfork_ at us?"

The team exchanged a look. They ran.

.

"They're totally insane," Gajeel said when they paused to regroup outside the town. "Batshit crazy. Psycho. Bonkers."

"Bonkers," Droy repeated flatly.

"It's good money, though," Pantherlily pointed out.

They stood there for a moment, debating what to do. Then, finally, an idea:

"Why don't we go incognito?"

"Incognito?"

"In disguise."

"In disguise as who?"

"Well, they said they don't like Fairy Tail, but it seemed like mostly they don't like _us_. So maybe we can just pick a _different_ group from Fairy Tail, since we still have to show our guild marks."

"But who?"

"Well, there is _one_ group that has a similar makeup to ours…"

They exchanged a look bright with the light-bulb shine of the perfect idea.

"Team Natsu."

**Author's Note:**

> Kind of disjointed since it wasn't supposed to be a standalone and maybe kind of cheesy, but I had fun with it lol


End file.
